Due to lack of interest, I have decided to discontinue this blog series.  It was a good excursion! Blessed sailing on the Isle of View.  The Skipper

The Isle of View- Living in a Home

Isle of View- Living Safely at Home

 

It’s more difficult to prepare reflection on this blog than it is to prepare a homily. I’m not sure if it’s  because I am more used to preaching than I am writing. I believe another factor is that in writing this blog I have to start from scratch. In preparing a homily I am given the readings from Scripture from which to be inspired by the Holy Spirit. I do pray before I write this blog. Then I stare at the blank Word document page. I ask myself why I am doing this and what do I write. I know I started this series of Isle of View because I had slowed down tremendously after my surgery in December. I had time and ideas to work from in writing this blog. Now I am back in the frenzy of church ministry. And I find I have little time and fewer ideas.

However, I know God speaks to us through our everyday experiences just as much as he speaks to us to the Scriptures. In listening to what is happening in the world today, I’m struck, again, by the violence in the world. And the violence that seems most prominent in my consciousness right now is the violence that is called domestic.(“Domestic” comes from the word which means home. To me, home is a place where one can feel safe.) I am not sure why it’s called domestic other than that it happens usually within a house between people who usually live in that house. I just can’t imagine what it would be like to live in the place and never feel safe, respected, and loved.

There is much discussion about the causes of this kind of violence. Most would agree that there is an issue of power within a sense of insecurity that is manifest in this use of violence. This wanting power over someone comes from a lack of personal identity and self-empowerment. Because this violence is more often expressed in men, there is some discussion about what is devoid in the development of these men. I have heard and personally agree with the idea that men need to be affirmed as they grow through adolescence into adulthood. This affirmation needs to be expressed in some ritual/initiation that helps a male know and believe that he, indeed, is developing into mature man. Father Richard Rohr speaks to a father- wound where there is lack of other men guiding, affirming, and validating the male’s development, dignity, and identity.

The other side of this domestic violence is the victim’s world. This world, as with the perpetrator’s world, probably started out, in their childhood, by learning from and watching adults behave in violent manners. The lessons that were learned in being exposed to this violence, was that it’s okay to treat one another this way and that the victim deserves to be treated with less respect than what human dignity demands. Oftentimes, the victims believe that in some way they’re helping and even expressing love for the perpetrators by allowing themselves to be beaten and abused. There can be a belief that the victim can actually help and change the perpetrator from this violent behavior. The victim can gain a sense of being needed by the perpetrator in the dynamic of being abused and then being asked by the perpetrator to be the forgiver. There can be a sense of importance gained by dispensing mercy and forgiveness. However, this is a very unhealthy and destructive way to gain personal dignity, sense of well-being.

Obviously, dealing with this type of violence needs to be addressed in the development of children. Men and women need to teach their children how to treat each other with dignity and respect. Conflict will always be a part of life. We also need to teach children how to manage, confront, and even utilize conflict to work out our everyday living together. Disagreement is the arena for these personal voids of human development to be expressed. However, disagreement need not, nor should it ever be, the cause or the reason for violence to be displayed. The daily manifestations of violence and killing within home situations, only point to the urgent and drastic need for adults to support, train, and encourage children to manage conflict and even use conflict to get in touch with the significance of personal values in the engagement of love with other human beings. Conflict can and should help us to understand ourselves and challenge our commitment to love one another. Conflict management should be a part of elementary education. I believe this would even help to deal with the bullying that is happening in school these days. Parents, please assure that this is being taught not only in your own home but at school. I hope and pray that we are adequately dealing with this within our parish setting. Indeed, domestic violence has risen to a level that demands that all of us address this not only in encouraging those who are engaged in this violence to withdraw from that environment, but also to positively teach our children so that this terrible, destructive and disrespectful way of relating to each other does not continue to be repeated.

In the Isle of View, I believe there can be and will be a change in how people experience life in their own house. I pray that those feel threatened and insecure in these houses may someday be able to be loved, appreciated, and safe in what is typically called, a home.

The Skipper

Vacation: Contemplation on the Isle of View

‘tis the season for upcoming vacations. The weather instills a yearning for easier and more leisure living. Warm weather seems to entice us to engage in activities that are less laborious and more personally refreshing.

What are vacations for? I know when I was in school, it was a time to get caught up. Most of my vacations were spent writing term papers. Without vacations, I don’t think it would have passed many courses. Even now, I’m afraid to leave the routine of daily living for fear of coming back to a pile of papers and a computer full of emails.

No matter who we are, everyone knows the vacations are to refresh us, spiritually and physically and emotionally. We spend our vacations in such a variety of ways it’s hard to enumerate them all. Some travel;  some work on their second homes, the so-called cabins; some do leisure reading; some develop a different skin color; some totally immersed themselves in hobbies like: gardening, sailing, painting, biking, blacksmithing, wood carving, and candle making; some spend time with their families; some dedicate their vacations in doing nothing. Maybe you are one of those who do a combination of a few of these things.

Whatever you end up doing during the summer months, I pray that you have, that is, make time for quiet and contemplative reflection on God’s presence and generosity. For many of us, it is difficult to sit still for very long. It takes practice, discipline and appreciation of the value of just sitting. Some would say that this is doing absolutely nothing. The art of being present to presence is not valued in this culture. How many of you have taken advantage of the opportunity that the Saturday morning centering prayer affords us in the parish? Centering prayer is truly a good way to develop another aspect of what it means to be on vacation. If vacation means freedom from duty or measure of productivity, then centering prayer can do much to teach us how to let go of agendas, performance, and accomplishments. Centering prayer is allowing God to do the work. In this prayer, we simply are. It feels, at times, like a spiritual vacation.

May the upcoming vacations be safe, fulfilling, refreshing, and most of all gratifying in the simple fact of being. If anything is accomplished or happens at all in your vacation this summer, may you allow God to touch you in a way that you know you are blessed, you are loved, and you are empowered by His Spirit to make an eternal difference in this world.

This week, I’ve decided to append an article to this blog. It is timely and it explains the feast of St. Dymphna which is on May 15. She is the patron saint of those who suffer from mental illness. I believe strongly in the power of prayer to heal us. I strongly believe that we need help in praying about our illnesses. This is why I have decided to include this article which was given to me by one of our parishioners, Carol Couchot.

The Centering Skipper

A Healing Prayer-- by Carol Couchot

 

The topic of abuse always hits home to me, as my mother was very abused all her life, mentally, physically and sexually by both her father and mother. Feeling rejected and unloved, my mother committed suicide at the age of 50, when she felt life was no longer worth living.

My daughter, Elizabeth, has her MSW degree and lives in Gillette, WY. She has recently started the Mary Jane Brining Project (named after my mother) with a goal to eliminate the Stigma of Mental Illness and promote better care and concern for those affected by abuse.

 Being Catholic, we turn to Patron Saints, asking for their intercessory prayers for various needs. We recently learned about Saint Dymphna, patron of mental illness. Dymphna vowed a life of chastity to God. She was martyred (beheaded) by her father at the age of 15 because she rejected his sexual advances. Saint Dymphna was canonized a saint on May 15, 620 – 640 AD. I began just praying for her intercession of prayer, then was called to make the chaplets and bracelets, which you have been blessing for me. From some of the testimonies, it is evident God has graciously blessed St Dymphna and hears her prayers for those afflicted with mental oppressions.

As I dug deeper into Saint Dymphna’s history, I learned that there is a National Shrine dedicated to her in Massillon, OH which is only about 3 hours away from my home town of Piqua, OH,where my family lived. It is ironic that we lived that close and that my mother was buried on May 15, which is the same day Saint Dymphna died and now dedicated to her feast day. I only wish I had known about Saint Dymphna years ago. Maybe her prayers of intercessions would have made a powerful difference my mother’s life, breaking the chain of abuse for her, and our family as well.

The Mary Jane Brining Project, a foundation to help eliminate the Stigma of Mental Illness and promote care and concern for those suffering from mental abuse.

My daughter, Elizabeth, has always had a way of helping people with a problem, even as a young girl. As she got older, the problems became harder and she realized she would need education to appropriately help people overcome their issues and be able to move ahead in society. She went to college and then on to earn her MSW degree in social work in 2006. 

Liz, never knew her grandmother (my mother), who this project is named after, because she died before Liz was born. As Liz became an adult, the questions about how her grandmother lived and died brought answers she did not like. She knew that people with mental disorders do not get the concern and care they need or deserve. With this in mind the Mary Jane Brining Project became her goal.

We read and hear about unnecessary tragedies every day, many of which have to do with someone’s mentality. In the aftermath of the recent school shootings and other devastating incidences with tragic endings, Liz finally organized the Mary Jane Brining Project to promote care and prevention for people with mental illness. Liz worked with the Campbell County Community Resource Coalition in Gillette, WY, through which the project received its 501© status. She also established a pilot intervention program to help women better access mental health resources through working with primary care physicians to promote better treatment and care. Her next step include plans to become part of the Substance Abuse Advisory Council.

Needless to say, I am very proud of my daughter and support the project she has founded for the protection and care for the mentally disabled. Please read her letter below and visit her Facebook or BlogSpot to read the stories and testimonies and how it is possible to help people with mental illness to reclaim their lives.

Elizabeth’s mother,

Carol Couchot 

 

Mary Jane Brining Project

http://www.facebook.com/#!/maryjanebriningproject

http://maryjanebriningproject.blogspot.com

Thank you,

Mary Jane Brining Project

Elizabeth Pierson, LCSW

 

VISION OF PEACE ON THE ISLE

PEACE ON THE ISLE OF VIEW
Yesterday, we “celebrated” the 38^th anniversary of the ending of the Vietnam war. We remember, not because we want to relive the atrocities and the chaos of that era, but because we never want to relive that horror again. Remembering helps us to know how terrible war is. Most would say that nobody was a winner in that war.  Almost as many would say there is no winner in any war.

What is the purpose of war? Those who lived and remember World War II know the saying, “the war to end all wars”. Seeing what happened after that war, negates the validity of that statement. I have heard that World War II turned our economy around. I wonder about the simplicity of that statement. It’s difficult if not impossible, to measure the efficacy of any war, especially out of context of so many other global dynamics.

Building on last week’s posting of the Isle of View, violence and war have no place. In these last two weeks of Easter Season, Jesus is saying goodbye to his disciples. He does this by saying, “I give you peace not as the world gives you peace. Peace I give to you. Peace I leave with you.” My guess is that Jesus is referring to how the world tries, over and over again,  to establish peace through violence. The irony of trying to force peace through intimidation, manipulation, and elimination, has always struck me as true sand on which to try to build any foundation. When will humanity learn how to manage itself?

The peace of Jesus Christ is built on love and selfless service for ALL brothers and sisters, ALL neighbors, ALL nations, ALL human beings. To be selfless and to serve is a posture and a perspective that’s seems so vulnerable and noninfluential. It definitely smacks in the face of our culture as helpless, weak, and spineless. The peace on the Isle of View is only able to be established by fully respecting each one’s dignity and God’s willing justice for all. This justice seeks equity, equality and the common good, all at the same time. We struggle in how to balance individual rights alongside the common good. This is the arena in which the lawyer works. Mostly, we spend our time discerning which individual right has more weight over the other individual’s right. Most often this discussion never deals with the common good’s right. Actually, that phrase never is heard in discussion over rights. The love of the Isle of View always takes into consideration the individual and the common good. Jesus loves us so personally and takes in consideration the good of all. Indeed, as Pope Paul VI said, there can be no peace on this earth without establishing justice. Each and all have to be taken into equal consideration.

Peace can only come from a genuine love for everyone. Self-concern has to give way to the love of the other. If I am more important than anyone else, there will never be peace on this earth. Life on the Isle of View necessarily involves education, reflection, and practice of nonviolence and selfless service. Peace does not come simply from wishing it. It takes discipline, conscious and deliberate decision making, and constant examination and accountability of how we are carrying out principles of justice living.

At St. Joseph the Worker, there is presently a reflection process available precisely for this purpose. It starts on May 28 from 9: 30 – 11:30 a.m.  The group will meet on the fourth Tuesday of each month. I strongly believe this process should be ongoing within the Isle of View. Without it, how would there be peace?     The seeking peace Skipper.

The Isle of View of Half-Mast Situations

On the Isle of View, the flags fly half-mast every day. I wonder why, who, or what determines when the flags at Perkins, the banks, or the post office aren't fully raised. I often think that the media have to proclaim that it's a "national tragedy" or name the event a serious attack on our patriotic dignity, for the banner not to reach its tallest destiny.

Reality on the Isle of View is fully known. This perspective affords us the courage, the inner strength, and the hope to honestly proclaim that the violence of everyday life does not permit us to act out of denial or arrogance in displaying the colors in full view. The fact that there is violence every day stops us from acting as if the crisis is over and we can go about our normal lives. The Isle of View clearly recognizes how fractured, disconnected, and isolated the world is.

As a person of faith, one may ask how I can speak so negatively. Is it negative or real? To honestly face everything that happens in our everyday life is exactly what faith helps us do. The authentic life of faith helps us to admit the scope and severity of the desperation that is so pervasive and prevalent. This admission comes from a willingness to enter all of life - the difficult, the sad, the hatred, the love, the glory, and the beauty of living in solidarity with all of life. Attention is given to all the struggles and all the joys that affect all of God's creatures.  This attention is not manipulated or directed by what the media chooses to cover or ignore. 

From this island perspective, we can freely yet disturbingly make the admission that there is no clear diagnosis nor prescription for what ails the world with so many earthshaking manifestations of violence in total disregard for any form of life. I, for one, have no clue as to what is going on. If I did, I would package the cure, market it and sell it to the highest bidder; or just plain heal the whole world of all division, misunderstanding, hatred, and wounds which leave the ever-festering infections of resentment. After all, what do I really know about the causes and cures of the world's problems?
I have the suspicion however, that even knowing the causes would not in fact, eliminate them.

The View from the Isle tells us to love our enemies. Following the example of and acting on the power of our Lord Jesus, we can and ought to care about the unlovable in a way that expresses a dignity and value not rooted in anything that has been done or has failed to be realized, but from the fact that all creatures belong to God. In this way, people of faith seek ways to avoid the repeating cycle of isolation, alienation, and disconnection.

 Our faith, which places us on the Isle of View, tells us that what we know doesn't necessarily get us to where we need to go, but Who we know does. As the Good Shepherd said this past weekend, "My sheep recognize My voice. I know My sheep and My sheep know me.” The Isle of View offers a perspective only obtained through the personal knowledge of Who the Shepherd is. We enter into this knowledge when we choose to enter, with a greater trust than what any evidence would warrant, a transforming and challenging relationship with this Good Shepherd. The Shepherd not only protects us but leads us to be in that same kind of transforming relationship with others – especially with those who are difficult to love. This is why I strongly believe the Boston bombers throughout the world and in our own neighborhood are the invitation for us to prove to ourselves, if to no one else, where it is that "we live, and move and have our being.”  Do we live on the Isle of View which forces us to listen in such a way that would recognize the Voice of the Shepherd from someone who we would rather not hear? Does this desperate voice scare us because their methods and means are offensive and destructive? What did Jesus do on the Isle of View? Yes, He taught his own disciples a non-tolerant attitude towards violence. And He engaged with those who used violence. He could've run away from those who used violence to eliminate Him.  He chose to answer those who accused and condemned Him. His answers aimed, not at satisfying the goals of violence, but rather took advantage of the opportunity that the questions of the violent provided. His answer revealed who He is. Yes, the King of the Jews; but a Shepherd-King showing mercy and compassion to those who are unlovable. The path to the heart of this Shepherd-King is through his wounds. Suffering can open our ears of faith to hear His Voice.

Why is our suffering only given permission to be acknowledged when the media says it is okay? Why is it that with only certain tragedies we choose to unfurl fully the Stars & Stripes?  Our hearts are broken by so much violence and hatred which only seems to beget more hatred and violence.   However from the Isle of View, our hearts are broken not to become bitter and to perpetuate more of the same, but they are broken to be open to everyone who hurts and longs to hear the healing, compassionate Voice of the One who beckons us to trust even more because of the sickening, half-mast violence.

 How do we up the ante of our trust when, it seems, the more we trust, the more we are beaten down with violence? The view from the island tells us that it's only through sacred conversation where listening leads to knowledge of the Other. Jesus did not stop talking to the violent simply because He was against violence. He spoke to them through His nonviolence. He spoke to them with mercy and compassionate forgiveness, pleading to His Father “forgive them they know not what they do.” How else can one express love for the enemy? Even when the violent do not want to be loved, the people on the Isle of View choose to continue to love. This Love becomes more significant when the flags are flying at half-mast.     the salvaged skipper

 

Driving in The Isle of View

 Crazy drivers! Am I One of Them?

Last month, I took a defensive driving course for those 55 and over. Defensive driving, when one looks at it through the isle of view, is a lot like the spiritual life. The instructor opened the class by asking what questions we “students” brought to the course. One question dealt with the sign that says “25 miles an hour when children are present.” Does this mean only when children are out on the sidewalks, or does it mean any time during the school day when children on the campus? Another dealt with what one is supposed to do when somebody tailgates or cuts in front of you and how one is supposed to deal with inattentive driving.

The next four hours actually had to do with living everyday life in a spiritual way or as we used to say, with soul. Reflecting on the questions asked at the beginning of the course, I realized most of them had to do with either doing the minimum --what the law requires, or trying to change other driver’s behavior. The instructor was more spiritual than he probably realized. He dealt with our need to control others and trying to change their driving patterns. He deflected our concern about the other driver by encouraging us to reflect on our own patterns and behaviors. One of his first principles was to prepare ourselves before we get into the car. We need to be focused, removing all distractions. One suggestion was that we use the cell phone before we begin driving. He pointed out this requires planning and allowing time for preparation before actually driving. I liken this exercise to prayer. Prayer is our preparation for interaction with others in our daily life, so we can focus on what we are doing and why. It helps us to execute our daily tasks and interactions calmly and intentionally, being attentive to what’s happening as it unfolds. In this way, prayer predisposes us to be able to react in an appropriate manner.

 It takes discipline not to allow another driver’s behavior to affect our own. Our behavior always and everywhere needs to take into consideration the safety of all. If someone were to cut in front of us, shortening the braking distance between our cars, we should slow down to increase the distance between us. Everyone in the class said the natural reaction would be speeding up to shorten the distance between the cars, showing the other driver we didn’t appreciate the rude and disrespectful behavior. This kind of reaction would not only endanger ourselves and the car ahead of us, but the cars behind us as well. We need to assure that there will be a braking distance of at least three seconds, enough to stop without rear ending the car ahead of us and to maintain control of our car. This reminds me of situations where we need to buffer the friction between ourselves and others with mercy and forgiveness. Not engaging in the same behavior requires the discipline that comes from a life on the isle of view. Indeed, self-discipline and self-control are very much a part of a healthy spiritual life. He was indirectly saying: the best way to affect and influence others’ behaviors is by setting an example.

 This wise teacher spoke of developing a perspective that would help us drive more defensively, developing a spirit of cooperation by acknowledging that we’re all doing the same thing-- trying to get from one place to another. Through this spirit of helping one another, our travel will be safer, more pleasant, and even less time-consuming. He had numerous examples and statistics of how wasteful and

inefficient speeding and ambitious driving really is. Trying to get ahead of someone else doesn’t accomplish as much as one would think. The so-called time gained is actually insignificant and destroys a sense of teamwork among all drivers on the road. The idea of right-of-way doesn’t exist. Our task, our goal is to always and everywhere seek to find where we should be yielding. The connection to the spiritual life here is obvious. The Scripture from Romans chapter 12 which speaks of considering all others as more important than ourselves comes to mind.

 This “spiritual conductor” gave the example of a four-way stop at an intersection. He suggested if we see a car coming up to a stop sign at about the same time we are, we should slow down to assure that the other car comes to full stop before we do. In this way, there is no question as to which car should proceed before the other one. The other driver wouldn’t even realize what we had just done by allowing him to proceed first. How courteous is this? Talk about self-effacing service!

 Our instructor suggested a way we can arrive at our destination ahead of time and without speeding. To do this the only thing one would have to do is to leave earlier. This speaks to commitment, admitting limits, lowering expectations, and self-discipline. At times we think we can do more than what is physically possible. We think we are the only ones or at least the most important ones on the road. When we have so many things to do and believe that we can actually do them, everything and everyone that would slow us down are obstacles. Our behavior indicates we want to get rid of them or at least get ahead of them. There is a perspective is one of arrogance or self-aggrandizement. To make adjustments in our own lives, admitting humbly that our lives will be and need to be affected by our interaction with others will help us get a true sense of who we are on the isle of view.

This defensive driving course taught me something that I already knew, but my consciousness had forgotten: how we travel is as important as arriving at our destination. In fact, how we travel will determine if we arrive at our destination. On the isle of view, our travel could be our destination.

Safely driving Skipper.

the charismatic priest?

Isle of view – – The Easter Spirit.

Last weekend of a lady came up to me after mass and asked me if I was a charismatic priest. I wasn’t sure how to answer that question. Unfortunately, I think I knew what she meant.   I really didn’t like the implication. I think she meant that I was open to the scriptural gifts of the Holy Spirit. For example, speaking in tongues, interpretation of tongues and gifts of knowledge are often trademarks of a “charismatic” person. I resisted answering the question because I knew the cost of putting a label on anyone. A label stereotypes and minimizes the mystery in the beauty of any person.

The woman, I believe, was asking that question because I was talking about Jesus breathing His Holy Spirit on the apostles at Pentecost.  Last Sunday’s gospel reading was about Jesus appearing to the apostles in a room with locked doors. In the book of acts this event changed the apostles’ lives from living in fear (locked doors) to shouting from the rooftops that Jesus Christ is Risen. One of the characteristics of the Holy Spirit’s touch in our lives is that we are freed from the paralysis of fear.

Ironically, I believe this woman’s need to label what kind a priest I was, could indicate a need to put others behind locked doors. Yes, I would agree that being open to the scriptural gifts of the Holy Spirit is of great value and truly can be a pathway to acknowledge the beauty and wonder of our God. However, there are so many other ways to do this also. To talk about the role the Holy Spirit in our lives, is to acknowledge how God touches our lives in a way that we can experience and express the beauty of God. Last week, I preached on how Thomas doubted that the apostles had seen the Risen Lord because their receiving the Holy Spirit did not transform their lives in a way that freed them from fear.  After the event of Jesus breathing His Spirit on them, they still locked the doors.

If we truly receive the Holy Spirit, that is, if we are charismatic, the Holy Spirit moves us from fear to confidence and boldness. Let me expound on the example I gave last weekend during the homily.  A cheap violin was being auctioned for a few dollars. An old man from the back of the crowd interrupted the bidding by approaching the auctioneer and taking the violin. He tightened the strings, took the bow and made the violin sing like angels. People were amazed at the sound that came from that old violin. When the old man was finished, he gave it back to the auctioneer. The auctioneer began the bidding in the thousands of dollars. It sold for thousands more than what the original estimated value indicated.(this example is taken from Matthew Kelly’s Rediscovering Catholicism.)

This is what the Holy Spirit does. She awakens in us a sense of our value.  We believe in what God has made us worth.  Through our actions and attitude, we can sing like angels. The beauty of God is expressed and experienced in a way beyond our imagining. To live a life in the Holy Spirit is to express gifts and a willingness to involve ourselves in other’s lives where those gifts are best utilized to the benefit of others and to the glory of God. In trying to understand what this woman asked me, I asked her what she meant by the word, “charismatic”.  She said it is someone who speaks about the Holy Spirit all the time. I said yes. To the extent that we stress God’s transforming love in our lives, we are talking about the Holy Spirit. To talk about the true God is to talk about the transformative work of the Holy Spirit. I told her I try to talk about this God all the time.

Two days ago, over 70 parishioners were confirmed by Bishop Piche at the Basilica. Afterward, I asked a number of them what they were going to do now. Some said: “I’m going to go sit down.” Others: “I’m going to be more involved in the church”. I know they were put on the spot when I asked the question. Before the ceremony, Bishop PIché also asked four candidates what exactly was going to happen to them that night. In the week before, he also read 60 letters that were sent to him by the confirmation candidates from our parish. In his homily, he was able to refer to the letters but also to the answers that the candidates had in his interviews with them.  These kinds of questions make all of us think. What difference can and does the Holy Spirit make in our lives? On the night of the confirmation at the Basilica, Spirit was very much present. She was seen and experienced by a certain excitement, enthusiasm, and an admiration of who we are not only as a parish but as God’s beloved children. People acknowledged that sense or can I say, acknowledged the beauty of God in our midst. There was a certain awareness of Goodness among us. The evening of confirmation truly was an uplifting, inspiring and confidence-building experience. It was as if the artist-God touched the old violin of many hearts only to express the beauty of the Artist that night. I could hear the angels sing and I believe others could hear the same. I guess this was what it means to be charismatic.

The Spirited Skipper